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In the first list, you are coming to your partner to get something,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], control something or resist something. Your intent is to make your partner responsible for you and get your partner to change and do what you want him or her to do.
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Are you aware of what state you are in when you and your partner come together?
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• Do you come anxious or depressed,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], dumping your anxiety or depression on your partner through complaining or blaming?
"I read a lot of books about relationships that offer suggestions for how to approach your partner to get your partner to connect with you," she said. "These books do a great job of describing the ways we behave that cause relationship disconnection—which is helpful—but I have not found it helpful with my husband to TRY to get him to connect with me. We connect naturally when we are both connected with ourselves."
By Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
The official guide to Relationship Advice See all Articles by Margaret PaulSee Margaret Paul's Expert PageGet Updates on Relationship AdviceGet Updates on Margaret Paul Average: 5 Your rating: None Average: 5 (1 vote) Tweet
In the second list, you are coming from an inwardly open and complete place, filled with love that you want to share with your partner, or with a deep intent to learn about yourself or support your partner in some way.
• Do you come resistant,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], just waiting for your partner to want something from you so you can shut down and resist?
"And when we take care of ourselves," she added,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], "we don't need to talk much about problems. We get to talk about fun things!"
• Do you come needy, empty or insecure, trying to get love,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], attention, connection, validation or sex to get filled up or feel worthy and lovable? Do you use niceness, over-talking, blaming or complaining to try to get what you want? Are you trying to get love rather than be loving?
Think for a moment about how you come to your partner.
It's such a blessing for me to see my daughter and her husband coming to each other open, happy and loving. And I can see the wonderful effect it has on my grandsons, who also come, most of the time, to each other, to their parents and to me with the same openness, joy and love.
"I've found the same thing,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]," I answered. "Very few books stress the importance of taking personal responsibility for our own feelings and learning to connect with ourselves first. Relationships work when we come to our partner connected with ourselves,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and happy and peaceful inside. Trying to talk about anything to get connected or resolve problems when we are disconnected only creates more problems."
• Do you come to your partner because you see that your partner is overloaded and in a time crunch,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], offering your help?
• Do you come to your partner because you see that your partner is sad and hurting and you want to lovingly be there for him or her with your comfort and caring,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]?
On a recent visit with my daughter and her family, she and I were taking a walk and talking about our mutual work.
Rather than making your partner responsible for filling you up, making you happy, defining your worth or making you feel safe,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], you have done these things for yourself before coming to your partner,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], or you are coming genuinely wanting your partner's help with your own inner exploration.
• Do you caretake your partner to avoid him or her being angry or upset with you—doing what you think you 'should' do to keep the peace,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]? Is your primary intention when you come to your partner to avoid rejection?
Or…
• Do you come to your partner happy and peaceful, having done your own inner work so you can share love, connection and fun with your partner?
• Do you come to your partner because you are open to learning about yourself and you want your partner's help in helping yourself?
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As 1991's National Signing Day drew nearer, Coach Tom Osborne and his staff at the University of Nebraska were high on Faulk and confident he soon would be wearing the Huskers' scarlet and cream. After all, Faulk liked Nebraska. So did his mother,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], his guidance counselor,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and even his English teacher, who had a great deal of influence on him.
So remember,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], always ask your clients, "What side of the ball do you want to play on?" Then listen carefully to the answers.
It's a feeling that business people deal with too. Like football coaches,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], professionals must listen carefully to their "recruits" - their clients. How many deals does a salesperson lose, because he or she talks too much and doesn't respond to what the client really wants? How many star employees does a hiring manager miss out on, because he or she doesn't truly listen?
Faulk had a rough childhood, growing up in one America's most notorious housing projects. As a youngster, football was his passion. From an early age, he was good at the game and caught the eyes of several college scouts. Recruiters courted him as a junior, and by the time he was tearing up the fields as a senior, scholarship offers were pouring in.
At the beginning of 1991, Marshall Faulk was a wanted man - wanted by many of the nation's most prestigious football schools. He had just finished a stellar senior season as a star high school player in New Orleans, and college coaches were camped outside his front door 24/7.
Surely, it must have been frustrating for Husker coaches watching Faulk's career from afar,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], knowing they came so close to signing him. It's a feeling that haunts many coaches.
During an in-home visit, Osborne sensed he made a connection with Faulk and his family. As an experienced recruiter, Osborne knew when personalities "clicked" in a player's living room. There was no doubt in the coach's mind that Faulk felt good about Nebraska. In fact, Osborne admits that he thought it was almost a done deal - Faulk was practically on his way to Lincoln,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], Neb.
Of course, SDSU told Marshall they would be delighted to have him play running back, but with his blazing speed, Nebraska would have loved to have him in its backfield too. Faulk had the talent to excel on either side of the ball.
"It turned out we had been recruiting him as a defensive back,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], which most people had,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych]," Osborne said. ‘But Marshall deep down always wanted to be a running back."
On National Signing Day, Marshall Faulk signed with San Diego State University, far away from and far less prestigious than the many football powerhouses that were courting him. Osborne was surprised.
"Although we had been thorough, and we had done our home work," Osborne said, "we hadn't asked him a key question: ‘Marshall, which side of the ball do you want to play on?' That's why it's really important to do a lot of listening. I think we could have had Marshall Faulk if we had just recruited him as a running back."
The rest, as they say,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], is history. Faulk flourished at SDSU,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], running for 1,400 yards and scoring 23 touchdowns in just his freshman year. During a 13-year professional career, Faulk amassed 12,279 rushing yards and scored 136 touchdowns,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], some of the most impressive statistics in NFL history.
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a benevolent and kind countenance clothes body,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], full house eaves rainy day,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych],I asked the party: the party
I or the never say die for the people's well-being of the Communist Party of china! unlock lonely cable,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], in beyond the Milky Way maple hand dance Millennium rose call me -- a rare berth? who is in the dark who in the dilution at go to the thick ice. who is in the outer who in the Highlands,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], you more and more far away from meWhen we're apart my rationality in the sublimation feelings have been slipping I shout dawn in the night let the dawn in the heart of my a seed of hopeTrembling from a pile of barren land out of a baby face she desperately sucking dumb mother shrivelled breast the pity of passers-by neighbors. my thoughts of you already forgot how to speak my love for you the maple leaf will tell you gently I wait for you in the wild until tears in clothes the sound of a broken heart tearing wind penetrate the moon the Millennium moon my infatuation maybe you can understand I wait for you in the wild finally one day you come can you hand over to someone else the vast red at this time to all fade I love your eyes drunk to go another way process I wait for you in the wild your voice is fuzzy can be difficult to fuzzy search.
The red maple leaf spring rich drunk the clouds on the horizon the floating in the evening in the red as I love crazy eyes I wait for you in the wild my fervent love was sprinkled on the maple one evening or morning only hope you will pass by bent down to pick up I wait for you in the wild even Maple also know my obsession the Li Mingpiao under the maple leaf I put it into the letter not send letter happy people come to Beijing to enjoy the, love water cube vitality,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], I just want to put the blessing trimmed intoThe first light of dawn 3 month 6 days. -- to the West like day follow glory of ancient and modern to you. crude the great form has no shape. my dream on stilts.26 summer green.
You are a piece of colored stone the goddess patching the sky lost drink really dew,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], Si ShouTo know you is because the network of love love you because you are beautiful hand in hand into the marriage hall is because the way we have mutual affinity in 2004 us because the network connection you a hero from the school -- Yangtze University came to the city your smile your flirtatious your voice fixed in our 2004 it has become an indispensable part of my life I will give my life to put you cherish my wife in 2007 because we implemented the first dream life have their own property in Shenzhen we hand in hand into the marriage hall our happiness is our happiness forever in received a marriage certificate at the moment in 2008 the whole nation to celebrate the Olympic Games my wife in this country exciting day you gave me the best gift -- our son was born. hot the four seasons in winter back again reincarnation and love in the transmigration of soul never reincarnation millennium waiting to break the world peace in the vicissitudes of life after I beg to Buddha lotus is also quietly open in situ in the blue sky under the hope
cut off the moment,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], trees and flowers long strands of spirit here strands of unstoppable force forever for coal areas cheer song this is our lovely Coal Township the road running carriage of gold Hide hope dedication and hard gold and black sweat slurry it into every inch of the land a coal mining district also sway in coal. suddenly crashes.
(9) the wind stop turning the roadside leaves,No one doubts the youth time in at the foot of flowing away no doubt youth the bet stone piece is not as rough no doubt Youth wings led to follow the footprints of love no doubt it could in the long river of history without end period some people say you ride the wind approaching we lovingly because the wind chimes in circles has once again feel the cold in the tender some people say you from the distant ancient civilization historical inscriptions bearing thousands of years and water in the moon it is difficult to get rid of the flowers in the mirror jump blood seduce a bloodthirsty maniac chasing you like mad but there is often a rare passion and so the ostentatious words wind stand heel The Butterfly Butterfly old photos once again full of romantic poetry Lyric in the song with a bright colorThe moment Phoenix Nirvana it is more beautiful than the three points the birds chirping resounded through the world sound just arrived in your heart I heard the heavy door passionate man yesterday vowed to wait for delivery today to open is long overdue spoony womanHow will that unfortunate oath difficult as the eternal theme and righteousness sometimes dream Aiqing pairwise intersection,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], I love you I love you love with silk glue,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], at this time also can rest. full of philosophy of life. all solicitude; who can understand,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], do not know from when to rise the time dilute everything including memory,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], you're swaying body.
smile away. Over and over again, Therefore my dedication, verse mirage ship right,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], or missed some people and beast, your laughter bring happiness to hold up to the sky.相关的主题文章:

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Recently the faces of those in the ruling circle seem brighter than a few weeks ago. What has made the change? The economic situation has not improved and the support of the people for the government and ruling party has not increased. Maybe the change is due to their self pronounced "strong (powerful) government and strong ruling party." Beginning with the president,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], prime minister and ministers, all representatives now too spout this phrase, seemingly intoxicated by the words and gaining confidence from them.
In his New Year press conference President Kim Dae-jung said that "strong government" did not mean wielding power as did previous military regimes,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], but instead operating according to the law and principles, respecting the views of the general public to the utmost.
Why are those in the power circle suddenly calling for "strong government?" Do they have some inferiority complex,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], or think that they are powerless? Are they concerned that as the latter half of he government's term commences,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], opposition to it is growing in all sectors of society and many no longer take it seriously? Support for the government has fallen to 30% recently,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], down from 70% at President Kim Dae-jung's inauguration.
How has this happened? There can be said to be two general reasons for the loss of support; failure to do what the people want and doing things that they don't want. The government can only fulfil its role when it understands this simple reason and when it fails to do this,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], it simply blames public opinion on the media.
This general idea of critical newspaper reporting producing negative public opinion is apparent in countries both east and west. The government's thinking that the economy has got worse because the media report that it is,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], is an example of this. However,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], this is demonstrably false as newspapers tend to be a step behind public opinion. How can a newspaper be supported by its readers, if it alone insists the economy is bad,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], when businesses and the markets are in good shape.
The government's thinking is not limited to the economy,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], as there is a minister who declared war on the media,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], supported by many in the ruling party. This reminds everyone that people in the ruling circles concept of reality is far from that of everybody else. If the government truly believes this then it is a serious problem, as if the diagnosis of an illness is wrong then the prescription too is wrong. Its emphasis on "strong government" is an example of how the ruling circles have misread the people's mind.
(Political Editor - February 19,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], 2001)
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Fortunately, Leaky Gut Syndrome and related irritable bowel diseases can all be reversed and fixed without drugs or surgery. A Naturopath experienced in treating Inflammatory Bowel Disease will use natural medicines to "patch up" those "holes" and rebuild the mucosal lining. Once you're cured, you will have no ongoing maintenance such as drugs, therapy, nutritional supplements, or dietary or lifestyle restrictions.
The small intestine,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the largest organ in your body,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], is where two-thirds of your immune system lies. The small intestine is continuously activated when it samples molecules passing through the intestinal lining. Leaky Gut Syndrome refers to "holes" that have developed in the intestinal lining. These holes make the intestine more permeable than it should be. Consequently, toxins, waste materials,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and other substances can "leak" out into the rest of the body.
This breakdown of the mucosal lining is caused by taking certain medications, like antibiotics, that destroy the lining. Once the lining is destroyed, that leaves the tender skin, fat and muscle that comprise the intestinal wall exposed to digestive acids. These digestive acids cause inflammation and create "holes" in the intestines. This will then trigger gastrointestinal and other problems that present with symptoms like abdominal bloating, fatigue, skin rashes, excessive gas and cramps,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], joint pain,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and food sensitivities.
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There is much debate in the traditional medical community about the causes for Leaky Gut Syndrome. However, there is one thing can't be denied -- our digestive systems no longer work the way that nature intended them to work. Why? Because our diets and our lifestyles have merged in a way that's not healthy. The result? A diagnosis of Leaky Gut Syndrome or one of many other bowel disorders like colitis, Irritable Bowel Disease, diverticulitis, or Crohn's Disease. But what exactly is Leaky Gut Syndrome and what's the best way to treat it?
Once it has started,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], the "eating" of your GI tract does not stop,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], nor does it go away on its own. If left untreated, the acids will eventually destroy the whole colon,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and then you will then have Crohn's Disease,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], where you essentially have no remaining colon. If you seek traditional medical treatment at this stage, your physician will more than likely recommend surgery to remove your colon.
If you've been diagnosed with Leaky Gut Syndrome, you may be wondering, "What is a Leaky Gut, and how can I have one?"
Don't let Leaky Gut Syndrome destroy your colon and your life. No longer ask, "What is a Leaky Gut?" but instead ask,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], "How can I cure Leaky Gut?", and you'll discover the answer in naturopathy.
By Dr. Albert Snow
See all Articles by Albert SnowSee Albert Snow&#039,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych];s Expert PageGet Updates on Health Products and ServicesGet Updates on Albert Snow Average: 0 Your rating: None Tweet 相关的主题文章：

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